-Would you guys do what Rose did?-

yeah we love you. ^^

thank you tori.

hehe Tasha you have a... well.... um how do I....

lol i have a problem.. i'm addicted to shadow bite.. and facebook....lol.

lol im am addicted to this place, my roots ahve grown.

Also, Mel, she lost Micheal

Oh my! What happened to Micheal?!!

Yourwecome ah can't spell lol.l

You guys know why i've been down and sad right? And when i wasnt here last wednsday, well one was the whole enemy incident, (a few days ago) and well the second, oh god

Tasha, Tori, We lost Micheal to heart failure,
Why didnt he just take me....

It hurts so much. Oh god, I didnt even think he could go being so young, they siad he was healthy when he was born! Why couldnt god have taken me, spare Micheal's fragile little soul, oh god, why huh why?! Oh god, i've been trying so hard to hold in my grief but i, i, i, just cant! He was my godson! I was supposed to look out for him, i was supposed to take care of him, i was suppossed to protect him, its my fault he died because i couldnt see what was wrong with him! And now hes gone and i cant bring him back, oh god, why did this happen to us?

Have you ever had your heart break like this? It hurts so much, why, why, did He have to take Micheal, I'm so broken inside, i feel nothing anymore, i've tried to be happy but who am i to fake a smile? I should have died not him....

Omg! im so sorry that is so bad i will pray for you!

It's NOT your fault. If anything it is the doctors fault because they are supposed to monitor for those things before they release a newborn baby. It's not YOUR fault and you can't blame yourself. You are NOT a doctor and yes we love and protect our loved ones but we are not almighty and we cannot detect things especially things doctors missed. It's hard and i'm sorry to hear this. It's a tragedy. :hugs:

yeah that is horrible to hear.

thank you darlings, :hugs:
its just so hard

It is hard. And it will be hard. But your a strong woman and you will pull this. Little Micheal would not want you to go through your days resenting life. Live life in his memory and cherish him and his memory.

It is i've lost so many people, and gotten so much better then this had to happen. I'm not strong, I can't live knowing I could've helped him! Thats the thing I will try and the another is he had no life! HE was just a baby no more than a week and a half old! I didnt do all I could for him, I could have saved him, if i just hadn't panicked

i know what its like to loose someone and moaning and being sad doesnt help moving on and going on with life believe me i know.

rozaluvsdimka4eva wrote:

It is i've lost so many people, and gotten so much better then this had to happen. I'm not strong, I can't live knowing I could've helped him! Thats the thing I will try and the another is he had no life! HE was just a baby no more than a week and a half old! I didnt do all I could for him, I could have saved him, if i just hadn't panicked

I could never know what your going through nor any one else. But coming from a similar situation that was really screwed up i can understand you blaming yourself. I wish i could say that some day that will change but not really. I understand now 12 years later that I had no control in the matter but it still doesn't stop me from sometimes blaming my self and getting caught up in the what if's. I became a teen parent in the most unusual way. A guy I had dated for two years my first BF, my first love had a son with another girl, she was young as young as me 13 at the time. She wanted nothing to do with the baby but he wouldn't give it up. So he took full custody and after we had dated for a year I raised the baby like my own, so we made him my official god son. When we got older we were going to get married and then I would adopt him. Short of our two year anv. We were out walking home and just were at the wrong place at the wrong time. Some stupid kids wannabe gang drove by and shot at us. I got lucky, sort of. Tony died in my arms before any paramedics even showed up. Calvin my god son was only a year old, his mom abandoned him, and Tony was such a good guy and a good daddy. Tony didn't deserve it and neither did Calvin. I was still very young at the time and took it really hard. I got really depressed and by the time I was fifteen started spinning out of control. Tony's mother took custody of Calvin, and my mom decided the best thing for me was to move away. I couldn't stand being so far away from Calvin because he's all I have left to hold onto. when I was seventeen I decided the only way I could be with him again was to get my act together, so I did. Granted he's only my godson, and I do have two children of my own now, I have always loved him and been there for him as if he were my own. He's such an amazing young man now. I guess what I'm saying is I found my reason to pull through and move on, and you will to in time. The grieving process takes time I could not imagine what it would be like to lose one of my children and see their life cut short, I truelly don't think I could go on from something like that, but I hope you can. Like I said it will never really go away but eventually you'll learn to cope. I'm so sorry that you have to go through this.

JILL-JILLIAN-JUST JILL wrote:

rozaluvsdimka4eva wrote:

It is i've lost so many people, and gotten so much better then this had to happen. I'm not strong, I can't live knowing I could've helped him! Thats the thing I will try and the another is he had no life! HE was just a baby no more than a week and a half old! I didnt do all I could for him, I could have saved him, if i just hadn't panicked

I could never know what your going through nor any one else. But coming from a similar situation that was really screwed up i can understand you blaming yourself. I wish i could say that some day that will change but not really. I understand now 12 years later that I had no control in the matter but it still doesn't stop me from sometimes blaming my self and getting caught up in the what if's. I became a teen parent in the most unusual way. A guy I had dated for two years my first BF, my first love had a son with another girl, she was young as young as me 13 at the time. She wanted nothing to do with the baby but he wouldn't give it up. So he took full custody and after we had dated for a year I raised the baby like my own, so we made him my official god son. When we got older we were going to get married and then I would adopt him. Short of our two year anv. We were out walking home and just were at the wrong place at the wrong time. Some stupid kids wannabe gang drove by and shot at us. I got lucky, sort of. Tony died in my arms before any paramedics even showed up. Calvin my god son was only a year old, his mom abandoned him, and Tony was such a good guy and a good daddy. Tony didn't deserve it and neither did Calvin. I was still very young at the time and took it really hard. I got really depressed and by the time I was fifteen started spinning out of control. Tony's mother took custody of Calvin, and my mom decided the best thing for me was to move away. I couldn't stand being so far away from Calvin because he's all I have left to hold onto. when I was seventeen I decided the only way I could be with him again was to get my act together, so I did. Granted he's only my godson, and I do have two children of my own now, I have always loved him and been there for him as if he were my own. He's such an amazing young man now. I guess what I'm saying is I found my reason to pull through and move on, and you will to in time. The grieving process takes time I could not imagine what it would be like to lose one of my children and see their life cut short, I truelly don't think I could go on from something like that, but I hope you can. Like I said it will never really go away but eventually you'll learn to cope. I'm so sorry that you have to go through this.

Cassey and Tori, thank you, your support means everything to me. But I'm not the only one grieving. Porr Mel, shes sattered and Jeff is just as bad as I am. We are helping each other. His funeral was actually yesterday. I missed school with Jeff for it. I and Mel broke down together. When they brought his coffine down, it was just to much. I had ot stop MEl from jumping in there. So we stopped the coffin thing and she wanted him cremated, so shes doing that today, I'm going with her and so is Jeff. Wish me the luck of not breaking down again.

YEah best of luck and im sorry for your lose.

There is always a first time for everything, right? If I was in love, very deeply in love with the man who has just turned everything he feared of I would have run after him, why? Because it's the first time something like this happens, I will go after him withouth thinking about anything else.

My favorite Smallville character, Davis Bloome, said once: "If you find it, true love.....hold on to it"

That's what I'll do the FIRST time. Now, if he thinks about getting away to his evil side for the second or third time, I'll make a super-perfect-plan to bring him back, because my heart only knows his.......true love.

i like that u make a point.

I would definitely have to find a way to turn him back. I could never kill him myself and I couldn't live without him so I would have to change him.

yeah i think if she wouldve got training from someone else it might been diffrerent.

I think I would go. But I'd certainly have waited until I graduate.

Really? I might idk....

I don't think I would have the strenght to go after Dimitri emotionally, Rose is alot stronger than I am. She did what I could never do

I think I would propably go after him... I would try to kill him since it was his wish, but idk if when the time came... i could actually kill him, idk if i would be strong enough. That's why I admire Rose...